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Canoodling with my husband in public

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Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by fesspenter on Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:38 am

Last night, my husband Tim and I attended the ACTRA Awards at the Carlu in Toronto. The evening was so beautiful, as always. Tim had photographed the Guest of Honor, Shirley Douglas, actress, activist, funny, smart and mother of Kiefer Sutherland.

After the speeches, Tim wanted to introduce me to Shirley Douglas and disappeared into the Skymark room while I disappeared into the washroom. Now, Tim is so easy to spot at any function. He is 6'3" and shaves his head.

I returned to the Skymark room and I sidled up to Tim. I surreptitiously slid my hand under his jacket and put my hand lovingly in the small of his back. I wanted to be subtle. We were standing with our backs against the wall so nobody could see my quiet, loving gesture.

I looked up at Tim as I could feel him looking down at me.
It was not Tim. I squeaked, "OH! MY! GOD! I am SO SORRY! I thought you were my husband!". The tall, bald gentleman introduced himself as Carl. He said that he thought I was either hiding from someone, or deluded. My face felt burning hot. I was very embarrassed.

A little later on, I introduced my husband of 20 years to my husband of 20 minutes.

As we were leaving, Carl came up to Tim and I said that tonight was the most memorable evening he had ever had at the ACTRA Awards.

Is the moral of this story...
Never cuddle with your espousal unit in public?
Or,
is it...
Check the label to make sure I have the right husband.

My face feels red again while I type this post.

Keeping my hands to myself.
Keeping my hands to myself.
Keeping my hands to myself.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by anniel on Sun Feb 24, 2013 11:47 am

That is such a sweet sweet story! Thanks for having the humility to share it Lisa!
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Denise Cold on Sun Feb 24, 2013 12:30 pm

I guess that's the advantage to having a husband at eye level! LOL! I have started talking to hubby and turned and realized he'd wandered off and I was sharing remodeling opinion to a stranger at Home Depot.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Miss Ronnie on Sun Feb 24, 2013 12:45 pm

And the award for the funniest most awkward moment in the history of wives and husbands goes to...

Fessy!!!!!!!

I am dying from this. You have killed me. It's over. I can go peacefully with a laugh on my face.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Creabella on Sun Feb 24, 2013 12:59 pm

OMG! I can imagine you were so embarrassed ! Did your hubby think it was funny too???

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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Kammy on Sun Feb 24, 2013 1:04 pm

Trying not to laugh.....
Really, really....trying....not to.....

lol!

Oh dear. Oh dearie me. On the bright side, you probably did the guy's ego a world of good. However, to avoid it happening again, you should get some identifying mark tattooed on your hubby's conveniently-shaven head.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by fesspenter on Sun Feb 24, 2013 1:27 pm

Dear Kammy:
How would I be tall enough to see something on the top of Tim's head, since he is 6'3" tall and I am 5'6", and I would be carrying my very large, heavy award statuette for AwkwardMoments2013?

Tim thought it was very funny.

Actually, he did come home one day in 1994 and was exasperated.
He said,"Lisa! Why didn't you TELL me about THIS?!!!!
He doffed his baseball cap and bent over at the waist so I could see the top of his head.
There was a child-like scrawl of a happy face on his head.
In black permanent marker.

I told him I was too short to......
"HEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYY!
You fell asleep while you were watching Madison (our then 21 month old).

I told him that Sharpie pen marks cannot be removed.
He had that happy face on his head for almost a week.
He wore a hat all the time.
I laughed.
I felt he got his payback for falling asleep around a toddler with a Sharpie.


He just found out that nail polish remover takes Sharpie off the face (Ummmm, he said he had the Sharpie cap in his mouth, and he tried to recap the pen while the cap was still in his mouth. He missed the cap).

I would like to thank the Academy & the Forum for this Awkward Moments Award.
Why does my statuette have a tramp stamp above her buttocks that says "Miss Ronnie"?

Thank you for letting me share.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by veelux on Sun Feb 24, 2013 1:32 pm

LOL..That is a very cute story - both of them. Thanks for sharing. We all need more smiles in our lives and I am sure Carl has told the story over and over and made lots of people smile too.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by l!zzie on Sun Feb 24, 2013 1:57 pm

Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

Sorry... This is just too funny!!

I went swimming with hubby and had no lenses. Got very bad sight without them, but my hubby's dark haired, so I just kept close to him. Had been blattering for 5 minutes and asked him why he didn't answer me.... Needless to say, it wasn't my hubby, but some other darkhaired man....
Mine stood beside the pool and almost wept of laughter....
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Luvs to paint on Sun Feb 24, 2013 3:26 pm

Fesspainter, I did something similar at my wedding reception years ago. I thought my new hubby was standing beside me (his back was to me) and reached down and playfully patted his bottom and then grasped his hand, He looked around and I realized I had just gotten fresh with one of our neighbors (but with similar build) and was now holding hands with him, I was SO glad no one else had noticed and he sure had a shocked look on his face! Glad he and his wife have a good sense of humor. My hubby got quite a kick out of it too.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by FacesBySarah on Sun Feb 24, 2013 6:26 pm

Oh that is too funny!! I have been on the receiving end of that particular situation. My best friend and I are both blondes with waist length hair, at her wedding rehearsal I was standing in the aisle talking to another bridesmaid when a person who I thought was my husband walked up behind me, put his arms around my waist and kissed the top of my head, I smiled, turned and looked deep into the eyes of the GROOM!! Who went "you're not Sarah!" to which everyone laughed, because I actually am named Sarah too - so was the bride. Believe me when I say that little accident made its way into almost every speech at the wedding the next day. Wink

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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Michael Magick on Sun Feb 24, 2013 7:53 pm

ok I got to admit, I am a member of many magic related boards and have never seen such funny posts. lol now I understand why shannon has so much fun on this site lol
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Jody Rife on Sun Feb 24, 2013 8:55 pm

I am cracking up! What a great story. Thank you for sharing this. Laughing
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by PaintedFaces on Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:29 pm

LOLZ. Fess, you crack me up. Groping a stranger at a fancy party. heehee.

My husband was the recipient of one of those moments many years ago. We were at one of those party plan events. You know, like Tupperware, only with lingerie. One of my friends bounced up behind him, all excited and said "Honey, would you buy this for me?" waving a lacy bit of nothing in his face.

"Sure, but what would your husband say" was his deadpan response. Very Happy

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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by A New Face on Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:39 pm

cheers lol love this place for just such occasion
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by l!zzie on Mon Feb 25, 2013 3:13 am

lol! Kara!

@ Michael: what took you so long then?!
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by rthling on Tue Feb 26, 2013 11:53 am

Somehow I missed this thread! Haha! Too funny!

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away I went on a European college trip soon after I got engaged.
Sweet fiance gave me a card before I left which made me cry. With tear blurred eyes, I reached for his hand, only to find that he had moved to my other side and I was holding a fellow traveler's boyfriend's hand. She was not amused.

Then, during intermission in a London theater, I stood to let someone past. Being terrified of heights, and since I was on the front row of the balcony, I reached behind me and grasped the back of my seat for reassurance. It was not my seat, however, but the knee of one of the male professors who was chaperoning the trip. His wife was not amused, either.
Some women need to get over themselves.

Come to think of it, both of these events took place when I was a hot young, THIN, busty thing. Maybe that was the problem.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Miss Ronnie on Tue Feb 26, 2013 12:11 pm

Diane, I'm sure you are still a hot and busty thing...
We are still young, if you compare us to Galapagos tortoises...
And thin schmin.... we are just over-stuffed with love I love you
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by rthling on Tue Feb 26, 2013 1:08 pm

Well, my sweet hubby says I'm still hot. And many people tell me I look half my age, which is hilarious, given the age progression photo I posted to FB last night, but, due to a certain surgery in 2001, I'm no longer the "busty thing" I once was.
Thin is relative. I'm smaller than, say, a house. hehe!
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by kingsmeadmama on Tue Feb 26, 2013 4:53 pm

lol! I'm so sorry, but I am killing myself laughing, mostly because I can totally see this happening to me. My DH and I are quite affectionate - much to my children's horror.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by fesspenter on Tue Feb 26, 2013 5:02 pm

Yeah,
Our oldest daughter was SO horrified if Tim placed a hand on my butt, and MORTIFIED if our lips actually touched. Madison would scream "PORN!!!!" at us when we would kiss.

I wonder what she would have screamed if she saw me at the ACTRA Awards with a man who was NOT her daddio.

xoxoxo
(porn)
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by kingsmeadmama on Tue Feb 26, 2013 5:06 pm

fesspenter wrote:Yeah,
Madison would scream "PORN!!!!" at us when we would kiss.
xoxoxo
(porn)

that sounds like something Jared would do. Right now it's mostly EEWWWWW!!! Do you HAVE to do that?!?!?!?

or AWWWKWARD!!!!!!! drawled out by my 7 year old.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by fesspenter on Tue Feb 26, 2013 5:41 pm

It's so funny that the very people who were created because of a kiss and everything that transpired afterwards are so repulsed by any affection.
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by l!zzie on Wed Feb 27, 2013 2:04 am

Sometimes it's so easy to take revenge for every night they kept you awake... My son doesn't like to see boobies.
I just have to say: I fed you out of those you know! to make him shivver all over!!
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Re: Canoodling with my husband in public

Post by Jobena1 on Wed Feb 27, 2013 9:43 am

Lizzie and Denise.......lmao .....I dont know which one was funnier!
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