Face Paint Forum
Register today to be part of the BEST face painting community on the planet. You just aren't cool if you aren't a member!

I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

View previous topic View next topic Go down

I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by Britty on Tue Mar 06, 2012 10:30 pm

A lot of you know that I have made a major move from NJ to PA. Well to make that happen we had to stay with my grandmother, and we had to let our family dog stay with some really great friends of ours. After taking what seems like forever we got our house! We have been calling and calling these really great friends this week to let them know we are coming down to pick up Shay (our dog) this weekend. The husband called my hubby tonight and in more or less words said he isn't giving her back. I have known this girl for the passed five years. We have lived together, raised our babies together, and I got her the job where she is still working. I am so sick over this whole thing I don't even know what to do. We have papers for her, and hopefully with some help from the police we will be able to get her back. The husband has said that he has spent two thousand dollars on her..in 4 months?!? On a perfectly healthy dog?!? Who was already up to date on her shots!! Now he wants that money back. He says he has receipts and bank statements. What could he have possibly spent that money on? Now I would happily pay that money just to have her back, but after just getting this house (and the fact that I am a face painter) I don't have the money. What hurts the most though is that a friend could do this. She was like a sister to me....closer than sisters. I honestly love her and her kids. I am so hurt, and I have been nauseous about it all day. I really am at a loss and I really don't know what to think or do at this point. Hopefully some of you could put some light onto this situation. Sorry this turned out to be so long...I just had to spill.
avatar
Britty

Number of posts : 284
Age : 30
Location : Bucks County, PA
Registration date : 2011-03-31

http://brittydesigns.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by cattsy on Tue Mar 06, 2012 10:52 pm

First of all

*BUG HUGS*

I unfortunately know what it's like to have that kind of betrayal at the hands of someone you trusted Sad

Here's the unfortunate thing... With animals possession is 9/10 ths of the law. Because she has papers and is registered to you you *MIGHT* be able to get her back, however they can claim that the dog was abandoned and that's a hard fight. You could take them to small claims court (or whatever the equivalent is down there) but it would be unlikely you'd win...

My heart aches for you Sad I lost a very valuable cocker spaniel bitch in very much the same way. I ended up out of work and no where to stay, was couch surfing. Had a friend offer to co-own my bitch in return for letting her breed one litter, and once I was settled I could have her back. That was 5 years ago. I've been trying to get her back for the past 4 1/2 years. She fraudulently registered her solely in her name (forged my signature) bred her multiple times and refuses to give her back Sad I try every once and awhile but it's beating my head on the wall. I spoke to a lawyer and wasn't given much hope.

My advice? Go down there, show up on their doorstep personally. Once they have you face to face it might be a little harder for them to be jerks. Have her papers with you, and if they still refuse to hand her over call the cops and say they've stolen her.... It might work, it might not. Since there was nothing in writing it's their word against yours... But go there physically, you'll get no where over the phone.

and, to anyone that reads this, WRITE IT DOWN!!! Even if you think there would NEVER be an issue, whether it's your best friend, your mother or the pope!! GET AN AGREEMENT IN WRITING. If you at all care about the outcome, write it down. Anything that involves lending/changing hands/temporary arrangements anything with monetary or sentimental value (animals included) write it down. have it witnessed. then there is absolutely NO miscommunications.

I hope it all turns out for you and you get your baby back Sad

avatar
cattsy

Number of posts : 284
Age : 35
Registration date : 2010-10-12

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by a face painting mom on Tue Mar 06, 2012 10:58 pm

Oh so sorry. Sounds like they fell in love with your dog. You should pay for the dogs food, and for any vet bills, but beyond that, you are not responsible for big money. I don't know many dogs that cost 12,000 bucks a year to keep, unless the dog is really sick, injured, or the people are being foolish.

Go pick up your dog, and forgive them. Give them what a fair amount of money, thank them for keeping your dog, and tell them that you are sorry if the whole thing become too much for them and that they were having trouble giving her up, and in the future, you will board your animals in these kinds of circumstances. You own the dog, and the dog is property, so the police or sherif may help you get your property if you ask them, but you might have to take them to small claims court, becaus the bottom line is, a dog is property. If they refuse to give the dog to you now, send them a letter and tell them that you will seek legal action to retrieve your dog, and you will not be responsible for the cost they encoure from that date by keeping your property from you and costing themselves money. In reality, it is all about how they feel about the dog. If they had really spent that kind of money, they would be ready to turn her over and collect, not keep her and spend more.

I hope you get her back, and I hope the wounds heal. I is hard, but it happens, and you will heal and make new and better friends and you will feel that close again. Sometimes too, people feel the need to pick a fight with people who leave them. It is easier for them that way. Almost every service memeber who is deployed will do this in the week before he or she leaves for a tour. It makes leaving, or being left just a little easier to take. It is a normal defense mechanism. Maybe if you look at it that way, it won;t hurt quite so much.

It will all be OK, I know it does not feel like it, but it will.

Hugs.
avatar
a face painting mom

Number of posts : 1913
Age : 56
Location : Columbus Ohio
Registration date : 2011-07-13

http://www.afacepaintingmom.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by SuzySparkles on Tue Mar 06, 2012 10:59 pm

What I would do..........

I would drive over there and stakeout the house..... When they let him out I would take him back.

Nobody would take my dog, he is my best friend and I would beat the living crap out of her if she tried to stop me.

But that's just me.

I had a best best best friend that I loved and told EVERYTHING......we talked like an hour a day..... ABOUT EVERYTHING...... Well all of a sudden out of the blue she decided she wanted to screw me over and tell my secrets........ No I had never felt so betrayed in my entire life.... She had told me things as well (like sleeping with her friends husband) and well since we were sharing each others secrets with the world apparently I returned the favor. She has no friends now and I still miss those days of just talking about nothing for hours with my best best best friend.... But I would never forgive her. So, no matter how great of friends you are with someone... they can always turn on you without reason. I learned to be more careful.

NOW GO GET YOUR DOGGY BACK!!

AT least it isn't as bad as my first dogs story, we moved from Guam and my dad had to leave our dog behind with a 'friend' of his.. When he made arrangements to get his dog back the guy told him he ate the dog.......... affraid
avatar
SuzySparkles

Number of posts : 2778
Age : 39
Location : Wisconsin / Milwaukee
Registration date : 2009-11-09

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by anniel on Wed Mar 07, 2012 1:33 am

Have you seen "Our Idiot Brother"...there's a creative solution in there...
avatar
anniel

Number of posts : 2317
Location : Denver
Registration date : 2010-12-27

http://entertainment-etc.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by PerfectlyPaintedFaces on Wed Mar 07, 2012 10:42 am

How heart-breaking... my pets are my babies, and if anyone ever pulled something like that I don't know what I'd do, but I'd sure as hell to everything in my power to get my baby back! Everyone else has some great suggestions here... keep us posted, okay? Big hugs to you.
avatar
PerfectlyPaintedFaces

Number of posts : 882
Age : 29
Location : Sault Saint Marie, ON
Registration date : 2011-11-03

http://www.perfectlypaintedfaces.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by Jilly on Wed Mar 07, 2012 11:04 am

If the receipts are for your dog, I would arrange a payment plan to pay them back. If they have purchased a dog house, kennel, bed, vet plan, bowls, leashes, etc.. I would want those items to come home with my dog. I would definitely want to see the receipts. I love my dog, I understand your desperately wanting her home. Sure hope you can get her back.

I agree there are many good suggestions here. I kind of like what Suzy would do.
avatar
Jilly

Number of posts : 75
Location : CA
Registration date : 2012-02-09

http://www.jillmckinsey.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by Britty on Thu Mar 08, 2012 11:06 pm

First off thank you everyone for your kind words..they are much appreciated. I guess we will find out what happens tomorrow. My husband is going down to jersey to the police station. He has already been in contact with them, and they know he is coming. I really wish all of this never happened. This is supposed to be such a great time in my life, and now it has turned into a nightmare.

To say that I am devastated is putting it lightly. I don't see a problem with getting our Shay back at all which is a great thing! It just sucks that I am losing a really close friend from this. I wish she had never suggested to take care of Shay. I wish that I wasn't so upset, because she seems to not care at all. I have written her on facebook, texted her, and called. She will not respond. Her husband on the other hand has no problem running his mouth.

It is just such a mess. We offered to pay for the food and vet bill (which was NOT needed..they doubled her shots which I am pissed about) he was not happy with that offer. He wants a cool two grand, and says he will not give Shay up until he gets it. I feel like I am in the twilight zone! I just hope that my hubby comes home with my baby tomorrow. I don't ever see being friendly with this girl again...I kind of want to blow up her spot on facebook. I know that is childish, and I probably won't. I just don't understand how she can stab me in the back so hard...I don't know...now I am rambling. I will keep everyone updated!
avatar
Britty

Number of posts : 284
Age : 30
Location : Bucks County, PA
Registration date : 2011-03-31

http://brittydesigns.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by JZino on Thu Mar 08, 2012 11:55 pm

I really hope this works out!!! I can't imagine having someone try to ransom our Sadie-Mae! I know that no number of internet hugs would keep me from dwelling on it all night. I think the ladies are right though, with your husband there in person, the issue will most likely dissolve. Sorry to hear of the loss of a friend but maybe you will discover she hasn't been terribly straightforward all along.

Sad
avatar
JZino

Number of posts : 87
Age : 29
Location : NY, NJ, USA
Registration date : 2009-09-20

http://www.jzino-bodyart.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by Britty on Sat Mar 10, 2012 10:24 pm

We didn't get Shay. The police said that we had to file a complaint, and than go to court. I am feeling very defeated at this point. Her husband has now agreed to six hundred. I just don't know what to do anymore. I am at a complete loss.
avatar
Britty

Number of posts : 284
Age : 30
Location : Bucks County, PA
Registration date : 2011-03-31

http://brittydesigns.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by cattsy on Sat Mar 10, 2012 10:35 pm

Sad I kinda figured that would be what happened...

There are a myriad of things you could do... Steal her back, take them to court, pay the money, keep arguing with them, but one thing is for sure you're not gonna get her back easily Sad

Did you actually go to their house? Did you confront them? What happened exactly?

avatar
cattsy

Number of posts : 284
Age : 35
Registration date : 2010-10-12

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by cattsy on Sat Mar 10, 2012 10:38 pm

and on another note... $600 for four months board of a dog isn't that unreasonable...

Around here average cost of boarding is $30/day

So if they had her four months that's about 120 days which would have been $3600...

It's horrible that they are doing this, I think it's absolutely disgusting... Specially when they were friends and now they are basically blackmailing you, unfortunately people suck Sad
avatar
cattsy

Number of posts : 284
Age : 35
Registration date : 2010-10-12

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by Britty on Sat Mar 10, 2012 11:10 pm

We went to the police station first. They were actually on our side (we knew who they were) We went to the house, and they weren't there. I heard that her mom was on vacation, and figured she would be there...she was. We called the other townships police department to meet us there. We knew him too (small world) the officer wanted to give us the dog, BUT shay was not there. Her husband own his own business and is a car carrier..shay was in the truck in PA while we were there in NJ. She told a bold face lie right in front of me, and said that shay was their dog.

How can you do that?! I will never understand it. The lawyer we usually use is also their lawyer so no one can use him. We are now at a draw. We have no problem paying him at all, but he keeps going back and forth. One minute he says give me money, and the next he says he isn't giving up shay. I don't know what to do. I am honestly heartbroken at this point. They said to get another dog...I DON"T want another dog. I want MY dog. I have been in tears for three days now, and I don't know what to do.

I just want her back.
avatar
Britty

Number of posts : 284
Age : 30
Location : Bucks County, PA
Registration date : 2011-03-31

http://brittydesigns.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by cattsy on Sat Mar 10, 2012 11:59 pm

Awwwwe... honey *sighs*

A piece of gentle advice... Move on Sad as much as that sucks and as hard as it is.... Move on. You have a new house to worry about and you're far away. You'll never be able to replace Shay and it'll never really stop hurting, but it'll pass.

Trust me... I know it hurts... I know it sucks... as much losing your dog as the betrayal... People suck!

I mean this in the kindest way possible, cause trust me I know how much it sucks. I still think about LUcy every day. She was a gift from my mentor, the last bitch of a line that she had been breeding for 40 years, and she died of cancer the year after she gave me Lucy. I promised her to protect her bloodline and continue the work that she started and that was robbed from me. Lucy was the best dog I've ever had and to this day my heart aches for her and it's been five years.

There will be other dogs... Perhaps this is just how it has to be... as much as you dont' want to hear it Sad

*hugs* There's nothing that anyone can say to make it better and it's up to you how you want to proceed, but it sounds like they love her very much and will take good care of her.

avatar
cattsy

Number of posts : 284
Age : 35
Registration date : 2010-10-12

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by PerfectlyPaintedFaces on Sun Mar 11, 2012 10:45 am

You know what I'd do at this point? I'd go camp out in their backyard (behind a tree or something), and when they let the doggie out for a pee, I would take her home. To her rightful home.

It may sound a bit extreme, but the situation is so ridiculous it might call for something extreme.
avatar
PerfectlyPaintedFaces

Number of posts : 882
Age : 29
Location : Sault Saint Marie, ON
Registration date : 2011-11-03

http://www.perfectlypaintedfaces.com

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by pjhamel on Sun Mar 11, 2012 10:34 pm

Start recording everything that they say. Stick to email/text messaging to communicate with these people so that you have everything in writing (you can't record phone calls because it is illegal). Get them to admit via email that Shay is your dog, and get them to tell you via email that they will let you have her back if you pay them. Then go back to the police.

Once you have the documented proof, they can do nothing about it. They will have to give her up. If they make a fuss about it, get another lawyer and sue them for custody.

Don't do anything stupid like trying to kidnap her back. This will make you look horrible if you do end up in court.

Take the high road. Being the better person doesn't mean that you start being nice to them and let them keep the dog; it just means that you are more conniving about the way you go about getting her back. It also means that you will look better on paper when the courts eventually look at all of the documentation (if it comes to that).
avatar
pjhamel

Number of posts : 673
Age : 28
Location : Florida
Registration date : 2010-01-23

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Naples-FL/Naples-Face-Art/15236981

Back to top Go down

Re: I can't believe this is happening. Such betrayal...

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum